A Life Changing Decision - Grace Wang’s Testimony

I’m a baby Christian, reborn 2 years and 8 months ago now, through the ministry of CCCGW’s Happiness Group in the Fall of 2021.

During the past two years, my life has changed dramatically, from knowing nothing about God, to learning to invite him into all aspects of my life—marriage, parenting, and career.

Let me start my testimony from the moment I prayed in public, on the evening of October 9, 2021, to accept Jesus as my Savior and to follow him.  Up to that point, I lived like everyone else, pursuing my own plans and life goals.  I had no idea that I would be making such a big decision that evening.  Yet after attending the Happiness Group, getting to hear about God, and starting to pray, I felt something had changed.  A peace came over me that I had never experienced before.  That is why I raised my hand to follow Jesus that night after Pastor Daniel asked if anyone decided to follow Jesus. I was not entirely sure what exactly had changed, and what this experience meant for me.  I did not sleep well that night because I kept thinking about my decision.  Many mornings thereafter, I asked myself, “Am I now really a Christian?”

I mulled over my decision for almost a month, telling no one about it, not even my family.  Eventually, I had to tell my husband, because I wanted him to bring my kids to witness my upcoming baptism ceremony at CCCGW.

I wasn’t sure how my husband would react when I was about to tell him about my decision.  I thought he might ask me why I believed in Jesus.  I didn’t know how I would answer him.  But I felt sure that whatever he asked and however I answered, nothing would stop me from getting baptized.  So, one day, I stepped into his home office and announced to him, “I have decided to follow Jesus, and I will be baptized on Thanksgiving.”  To my surprise, he looked at me and responded calmly, “That is a good thing.”  I was taken aback, and it was then my turn to ask him, “Aren’t you going to ask me why I’ve decided to become a Christian?”  He said, “No, because I also believe in God.”  I was truly shocked: during our 10 years of marriage, I never saw him read the Bible, pray, or attend church on his own.  When I first arrived in the US and wanted to go to church, he would follow me there without saying anything about his belief in God.

For quite a while after I became a Christian, I wondered why my husband never mentioned God to me.  This is the most awesome thing that happened in my life. For me, the hardest part is to believe in a God I have never met in person.  Yet, I do feel his existence through the peace I had never been able to find on my own and the help I received that could only be described as miraculous.  C.S. Lewis once said, “Christianity, if false, is of no importance, and if true, is of infinite importance. The only thing it cannot be is moderately important.”  I am amazed my husband never bothered to tell me this most important thing about the universe.  As a new Christian, I wanted to tell everyone I know that God really exists.  I started to tell my family and friends my belief. That was when I started to realize - it is not quite easy to share the good news of knowing God, especially family members. I am very close to my sister, we share everything. Even so, after I repeatedly told my sister about God, she protested, saying “If you don’t stop, I’ll not talk to you anymore.”  My effort seemed to have ended in failure.  I was confused. Yet, God patiently guided me through the journey. I started to learn how to be humble, obedient, more patient, and quieter—qualities that are all still a work-in-progress in me.  During the two years communicating with my sister about God, I learned to stop pursuing the pleasure of presenting a strong argument and to let go of feeling frustrated when my plans did not work.  I just needed to do my best every day, knowing that the result of my efforts and what happens tomorrow are all in God’s good hands.  Two years later, on the exact night when I first began drafting this testimony, my sister called me to pray for her.  She told me that she wanted to know more about God, read the Bible and go to church. I started to understand a little more that God uses us to spread the gospel, not because he relies on us, but instead, because he wants us to experience the journey with him to share the grace we received with other people.  I believe he wants to train me to be a better person, a person more like Jesus.  “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” I also started to understand a little more about why my husband did not spread the gospel to me.  God reminded me that someone did try to spread the gospel to me and I walked away. Yes, Christianity is the most important thing about the universe.  But in order to start on that journey towards Christianity, people must determine to pursue as a priority to get to know more about God. I used to prioritize things other than God. I am very grateful that God found me, opened my heart to pursue the truth. I became his daughter, started going to church and continued my journey experiencing a new life with God.

For half a year after I was baptized, I attended church alone.  I had no idea when my family would accompany me, but God knew.  He knew that my husband is the kind of man who honored holidays.  So, on Mother’s Day in 2022, when he asked me where I’d like to go that day, I replied that since it was a Sunday I’d like to go to church.  That’s how my husband, the kids, and I found ourselves attending church together that day.  My husband’s heart was touched by Pastor Rim’s Sunday school discussion and continued to attend church regularly since that first Sunday.  My kids used to have a choice to stay home with daddy or attend church with mommy. They used to choose to stay home.  After that Mother’s Day, they have also been coming to church regularly and attending the kids’ Sunday school.  I thought it would be just a “have-to-do” thing for them since they must follow their parents. But God had an even greater plan, a plan in detail step by step, for every one of us, more than what I asked or imagined.

The next year, in February, 2023, on a regular Sunday after church, each of my kids told me, “Mom, I want to be baptized.” I was, of course, excited, but given my own experience and my husband’s faith journey, I thought I should give them more years to make such an important decision. I tried to hide my excitement. I asked them, “Why do you want to be baptized?”  Of their many reasons, one was particularly striking: “I want to be God’s daughter and follow his wisdom.” Thanks to CCCGW’s Sunday school teachers, my kids had a far more mature understanding than what I had when I decided to follow Jesus!  But still, I tried to be calm, saying “This is very nice.  Let’s sleep on it.”  That night, my girls volunteered to pray for the first time.  It was a beautiful prayer, hearing them tell God that they want to be his daughters.  I thought they would forget about their prayer the next day.  But for the next three days, the first words out of their mouths when they saw me, whether in the morning waking up or afternoon arriving home from school, was, “Mommy, I’m serious, I want to be baptized!” It was as if they knew I wanted to observe them more closely.  The third day, a Wednesday, after they told me again, “I want to be baptized and please tell our Pastor!” I stopped hiding my excitement and called Pastor Daniel to tell him about Elizabeth and Samantha’s big decisions.  That Friday, at the Mark fellowship Bible study, both showed they were very serious about following Jesus, and were exceptionally obedient that day, wearing what I told them to wear and doing what pastor Daniel, my husband and I told them to do.

Over the past two years, everything in our family—the relationship between me and my husband, and between me and my kids—had changed for the better in amazing ways.  We’re working on new goals - more harmony, less arguments, better parenting in God’s wisdom.  One night, we were so happy that I decided to flatter my kids, saying,” Sweeties, you’re perfect.”  One of them looked at me and said, “Mommy, I’m not perfect, no one is perfect. I have sins.”  Again, I was overwhelmed by my child’s response.  I pretended to be calm, and said, “Ok, let me reorganize my sentence.  Yes, you’re not perfect, but you’re perfectly loved.” She was then satisfied and said, “Yes, that’s right, I’m perfectly loved, just like the words in the song you like.”  One of my favorite songs is: Perfectly Loved.  So, I would like to end my testimony with its lyrics (Singer: Rachel Lampa):

Who said that you weren't beautiful, and that you didn't belong in your own skin? 

Who said that you were all alone, and that you're never gonna find love again?

 

So many little words, so many little lies that have followed you all your life. 

Looking for the truth, looking into your eyes, and you'll see it's been there the whole time. 

 

In the hands of infinite, as the wounds of the world became his, 

See the kindness heaven has for you and how he has always been drawing you in,

 

So many open doors, so many miracles that have followed you all of your life,

Looking for the truth, looking into your eyes, and you'll see it has been there the whole time.

 

You are not a problem, you are not a mistake, don’t need fixing or solving, in the arms of his grace,

You are perfectly human, made from the dust,

You’ve got a heart, broken & scarred, yet perfectly loved.

 

Ooh, even when you were running, even when you were hiding, 

Never been a moment that you were not perfectly loved, 

When you barely believed it, when your eyes couldn't see it, 

Every single moment that you’ve always been perfectly loved.

 

Praise the Lord!

Grace Wang

7.21.2024